I Miss Him

Have you ever caught yourself saying the same identical statement with an entirely different relevance attached to each? Or maybe you have been asked a question with two completely different meanings that left you scratching your head? Take these for example;

What do you think about the present? This question could have to do with such weighty issues as the economic crisis, the overturn of power in the House and Senate, the latest terrorist warnings or that awkward gift you got last Christmas.

What is your favorite season? You might hastily respond with all the attributes of your most favorite time of year while the inquirer was merely concerned with how least to offend your culinary palate.

How did your evening go? This could be a query regarding your prior night’s festivities or someone merely wondering if you managed to level out all the mulch they noticed had piled up in your flower beds.

Is Turkey your favorite? This time of year you are probably thinking of the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday and all your favorite trimmings when in fact the asker was just wondering what your most beloved vacation destination is.

This kind of thing happened to me just the other day. I was talking to someone about the upcoming migration of college students off to their prospective Universities with my son being one of them and I confessed that I was a little upset about it. When they asked me why; I replied “because I miss him”. Even though he had not left yet, I was already contemplating the ache I would feel when he was gone. While I am happy for him that he is following his dream, I am sad because I knew it will be a hard transition and I was already missing him.

Fast forward to another discussion that very evening. I was sitting with some friends and we were musing over how time consuming the demands of ministry can be when I blurted out “I miss Him”. I realized that I had been spending so much time doing the work of the Lord that I had sacrificed the time that I was actually spending with Him. For years I had been very ill and since I couldn’t do much physically, I was able to devote huge blocks of time alone with Jesus. Now that I am more mobile and functioning at a much greater capacity of productivity, I found that that time had diminished considerably. I pondered whether that was what was supposed to be or have I gotten drawn into a life of business that wasn’t what was best for me?

The account of Mary and Martha, found in Luke 10:38-42, resonated new meaning to my present situation. Was Luke warning us in that narrative of the danger of getting too involved in doing for the Lord that we forget about the vitality of receiving from Him? Am I allowing Jesus to minister to me so that I may minister to others? Am I allowing Him the access He needs to my life so He can do that?

I remember reading a book many years ago that talked about spending quality time with your children. The author went on to explain that it was vital that we make that time with our children in order to nurture them and cultivate a life of character. I was provoked by the author’s next words; he noted that you can’t have quality time without quantity of time. In this day of instant everything, have I relegated my spiritual life to a certain time frame and then I need to move onto the next thing or do I sit and wait until I have been ministered to and then I move. Have I forgotten that God is the one who gave me the work to do in the first place and He is well aware of the time constraints that it brings? Have I chosen the “one thing that is needed”? I don’t know.

While I can’t do a whole lot about my son heading off to college, I will dearly miss him, I can make it my purpose to cut out some things in my life that are just wasting time to make room for Jesus. If I am expecting a quality connection where I recognize and enjoy a vital relationship with Him, then I am going to have to make time, quality time. And as I previously pointed out, I can’t have quality time without quantity of time.

“But those who wait on the LORD shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings like eagles. They shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31